Blue Day 2008: Depression, Anxiety & Me

Today, October 10, is World Mental Health Day. Beyond Blue has also declared the entire month of October Anxiety and Depression Awareness Month with the week from 5-11 October being designated Mental Health Week.

Blue Day 2008 are calling for those active in the social media space to contribute to depression and anxiety awareness. You can follow BlueDay2008 on Twitter or become a fan of their Facebook page.

Here is my personal story…

I’ve always been an insomniac. I go through periods where 3-4 hours of sleep a night is the best I can manage. I’ve seen many doctors about it, and all they ever did wasprescribe a course of sleeping pills and send me on my (not so merry) way. In December 2006 I had another onset of insomnia, I saw a local doctor several times over a period of 2-3 months, she kept asking if I had any ‘worries’ on my mind, to which I responded no. She prescribed increasingly strong sleeping pills, none of which helped. After 3 months of very little sleep I was despairing. I felt terrible, I couldn’t sleep, I didn’t want to be around anyone, I couldn’t see myself ever feeling good again. I sought a second opinion and was instantly diagnosed with severe GAD (Generalised Anxiety Disorder) and depression (triggered by the anxiety). I felt so releived to know there was actually something wrong with me, and that something could be done about it. I was prescribed Lexapro and this had an almost immediate impact on me. But the first step in getting better was the feeling that the doctor actually understood me and wanted to help, I finally had HOPE.

A common misconception in relation to anxiety is that it means you are worried about something. The doctor I first saw kept asking me if I was worried about something, and the fact was, I wasn’t. I’d had a bad 12 months leading up to my diagnosis, and there were a lot of things floating around in my head. For me, anxiety means my brain rarely switches off, it means I over-think things that rationally I know don’t need to be over-thought, but there’s a trigger in my brain that stops me from turning these thoughts off. It’s unfortunate that there are many health care professionals out there who lack an understanding of an illness that affects so many people.

There are so many misconceptions about depression. One that bugs me is when people think being depressed is being sad. WRONG! It is a CLINICAL CONDITION, it goes so far beyond being sad, it means you lose all hope and motivation, you think you are worth nothing. It’s not something that you can just ’snap out of’ its something that you need help to manage. And it can be managed, with medication and/or counselling. Depression doesn’t mean you can’t function effectively within society. If I didn’t tell you I’m an anxiety and depression sufferer, you’d never guess – I’m hopelessly optimistic and I’m almost always smiling or laughing (except for when I’m daydreaming and staring off into space).

Depression affects us all, if you think you don’t know somebody who suffers from depression or a related illness, you’re most likely wrong.

Depression and those I love. In my life I have known:
A wonderful person who took their own life.
A post traumatic stress disorder sufferer who went undiagnosed for over 20 years.
A post natal depression & anxiety sufferer who went undiagnosed for 7 years.
A friend who tried to take her life, and thankfully did not succeed.
A friend’s son who was diagnosed with anxiety and can now function as a regular school-going kid.
And many others.

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